Here, Not Perfect: A Workbook For The Days That Feel Like Too Much

I have always loved the idea of a daily practice. The fresh notebook. The clean planner spread. The promise that, this time, I will show up for myself every single day.

And then life happens.

Someone gets sick. Work stretches longer than it should. The news feels heavy. The planner collects dust. The journal starts to feel like proof that I am behind at my own life.

That feeling is exactly why I created Here, Not Perfect.

This 128 page, 90 moment guided workbook is not another “do this for 90 days straight” challenge. It is a companion for real life, for the days when you feel anxious, disconnected, overwhelmed, or simply tired of holding it all together.

Instead of asking you to keep up, it is designed to meet you where you are.

The Problem With Most “Self Care” Workbooks

Traditional self improvement tools tend to come with a hidden rule: you must be consistent to earn the result.

• Miss a day and the streak is broken

• Fall behind and the pages feel wasted

• Skip a prompt and it feels like you are not doing it “right”

When you live in a world that already asks you to be productive, efficient, and always on, the last thing you need is another place to feel like you are failing.

Many people never finish the beautiful journals they buy. Some never even start. Not because they do not care, but because they are already tired before they pick up the pen.

I wanted something different. Something gentler, simpler, and more honest about what life actually feels like for most of us.

What Here, Not Perfect Really Is

Here, Not Perfect is a guided ritual workbook for people who want to slow down, feel steadier inside, and create small moments of awareness without turning their life into a project.

Inside, you will find 90 short practices, which I call moments. Each one follows the same simple structure:

• Center
  A short cue to bring you into your body and the present moment.

• Reflect
  A gentle question to help you notice what is real for you right now.

• Reframe
  A supportive thought that offers a kinder angle without denying the truth.

• Optional Ritual
  A tiny action, often somatic or sensory, that helps the moment land in your body.

• Close
  A simple sentence to help you step out of the moment with intention.

Each moment is written so you can complete it in a few minutes. There are no long essays required, no pressure to write pages and pages. Just enough structure to hold you, not so much that it feels like homework.

Organized By What You Need, Not By Date

Instead of starting on page one and marching through to page 128, Here, Not Perfect is organized by how you feel and what you need.

The moments are grouped into seven sections:

1. When You Feel Overwhelmed or Anxious
   Regulating the nervous system and slowing the mind.

2. When You Are Hard on Yourself
   Practicing self compassion and gentle reframing.

3. When You Feel Disconnected or Numb
   Reconnecting with presence and the body.

4. When You Need Clarity or Perspective
   Creating insight without forcing answers.

5. When You Want to Feel More Grateful or Content
   Shifting attention toward what is supporting you.

6. When You Are Growing or Changing
   Supporting expansion without pressure.

7. When You Are Integrating and Looking Forward
   Trust, continuity, and carrying this with you.

On a given day, you might open to:

• “When you feel overwhelmed or anxious” after a long day of bad news and too many tabs open

• “When you are hard on yourself” after replaying a difficult conversation in your head

• “When you feel disconnected or numb” when everything feels flat and you are not even sure what you feel

You choose a section, land on a moment, and let that one small practice be enough for today.

Why This Works On A Nervous System Level

The workbook is simple on purpose, but it is not random.

Each moment weaves together several practices that research has found supportive for emotional regulation and well being:

• Breath and body awareness
  Short, conscious attention to breath and physical sensations sends signals of “safe enough” to the nervous system, which can reduce the intensity of anxiety and overwhelm.

• Naming your inner experience
  Putting words to what you are feeling and needing helps shift emotion from something vague and consuming to something you can see and work with.

• Gentle cognitive reframing
  Offering yourself alternative, kinder thoughts supports healthier self talk without pretending everything is fine or forcing toxic positivity.

• Small, repeatable rituals
  Consistent cues, such as placing a hand on your chest or naming three things you can see, become anchors your brain learns to associate with “this is a moment where I slow down and come back to myself.”

All of this is wrapped in a non linear, permission based approach. That is important. When there is no rule to follow perfectly, there is no shame cycle when life gets messy. You are more likely to keep returning, which is what actually creates change over time.

You Cannot Do This Workbook Wrong

From the beginning, one of my core design principles was simple:

This workbook should never make anyone feel like they failed.

So:

• You do not have to start at Moment 1

• You do not have to do a moment every day

• You can skip, repeat, or wander through it based on what you need

• You can close it for a month and still be welcome on the next page

Think of Here, Not Perfect as a shelf in your home. It is there whenever you reach for it. It never scolds you for being away. It simply picks up the thread of your attention and walks with you for a few minutes.

A Glimpse Inside A Moment

Here is an example of how one moment might feel in practice.

Center
Take one slow breath. Notice where your body feels supported.

Reflect
What does it feel like to give yourself permission to pause today?

Reframe
You are not behind. You are here.

Optional Ritual
Place one hand on your chest and take three calm breaths.

Close
Thank yourself for beginning.

That is it. No pressure to fix your life in one sitting. Just a small adjustment in how you are with yourself in this exact moment.

Who This Workbook Is For

You might recognize yourself here if:

• You are carrying a lot of responsibility and want a place that is just for you

• You feel anxious, overstimulated, or on edge more often than you would like

• You have a harsh inner critic and want to practice talking to yourself differently

• You have tried traditional journaling and found it either too open ended or too demanding

• You appreciate a mix of intuition and science, but do not want to read a textbook to feel better

You do not need any special background or spiritual framework to use this workbook. It is designed for real humans with busy lives and full hearts, who want to move through their days a little more awake and a little less hard on themselves.

How To Use Here, Not Perfect In Your Own Rhythm

There is no wrong way to use this workbook, but here are a few ways people might build a rhythm with it:

• Morning grounding:
  Start your day by choosing one moment from the section that matches your mood when you wake up.

• End of day reset:
  Use a moment in the evening to close your laptop, soften your shoulders, and transition out of “doing” mode.

• Panic button:
  Keep it somewhere visible and open it when you feel the familiar rise of anxiety or the fog of disconnection.

• Weekly ritual:
  Choose one section to focus on each week, and explore a few moments from that theme without rushing.

However you use it, remember the central promise:

This is a practice of being here, not perfect.

A Gentle Invitation

If something in this resonates, consider Here, Not Perfect an invitation to relate to yourself in a kinder way.

Not by adding another big goal to your list, but by creating tiny pockets of presence inside the life you already have.

You do not have to be consistent to be worthy of care. You do not have to do all 90 moments. You do not have to turn this into a project.

You only have to begin, from exactly where you are.

If you are curious, you can learn more and get your copy of the workbook here:
90 Moment Journey to Calm Your Mind